Editorial Notebook

My amazing boyfriend

Staff member takes good, long look at current relationship

So, there’s this guy that I have been dating for over two years. We began seeing each other in high school, and have gone through a lot throughout our two-year relationship. However, I think that it’s time to end it. I can’t deal with him and his shenanigans anymore.

First of all, my boyfriend hates mint and anything remotely mint flavored. Who hates mint? He is honestly the only person I know who doesn’t like the taste of mint. Since he hates mint so much, I can’t use regular toothpaste when I brush my teeth (I have to use orange-flavored toothpaste when I’m around him), I can’t chew most gums, I can’t even have mint chocolate chip ice cream! It’s so awful. I didn’t think that cutting out mint would have such a huge effect on my life. Sometimes I just really want to have mint chocolate chip ice cream, and then brush my teeth with mint toothpaste and not have it be a big deal.

We all know the struggle of having a meal plan on campus. Flex Dollars are more valuable than swipes into dining halls in my opinion, so I have 10 meals per week and I get $450 per semester in Flex Dollars. I take my Flex Dollars very seriously, and try my best to budget it throughout the semester so I don’t run out. But of course, my boyfriend takes advantage of my Flex Dollars. He sweet talks me into paying for him to get food because he used all of his Flex Dollars this semester. I’ve probably spent more than half of my Flex Dollars on his food. He has no consideration for me and spends my Flex frivolously. It’s ridiculous.

The worst thing about my boyfriend it the fact that he is obsessed with his best friend Bruce Daniels, EIC of Le Polyteknique. It started off as a bromance, which is completely fine with me, but it’s now gone overboard. My boyfriend follows this guy around, appealing to his every whim. They’re always together, making me feel like a third wheel when I want to spend some time with my boyfriend. There’s a running joke that this guy is my boyfriend’s boyfriend, and it’s not really a joke anymore; it is like they are in a relationship and I am the side woman. This isn’t even something that happens with just this one friend either. I always catch my boyfriend making weird eye contact and constantly touching or hugging another guy. Maybe this is a normal thing, but I feel as though I should get more attention than some of his friends. I’m starting to wonder if this is a sign that he is gay …

As I write this notebook, I’m further convincing myself that I should end my relationship. I can no longer date someone who hates mint, spends my Flex Dollars, and is totally obsessed with his guy friends. Even though the incoming class is going to be 95 percent female, I’m sure I can still find a reasonable man to be his replacement. Oh, did I forget to mention that my boyfriend is currently the Master of his Domain of Le Polyteknique?