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Ask Brookelyn

Ask Brookelyn: April 26, 2017

Posted on April 26, 2017 in Uncategorized by Brookelyn Parslow, Contributing Editor

How do you deal with RPI when it’s got you down?

I typically force myself to go out and do things with friends, whether it’s going for a walk, going to an event on campus, or just getting food. Luckily, I’ve never really had a problem finding someone to talk to about how I’m feeling. Everyone here knows that RPI can be emotionally taxing at times, so I haven’t felt alone in my experiences.

If I don’t feel like I have the time to go out or see friends, I try to do at least one little thing for myself. I revisit my neglected YouTube subscription feed or watch a couple GIFs from the top posts of the PartyParrot subreddit. Sometimes I call my parents or my grandparents, because I know it makes them happy and that makes me happy too.

I’m really considering coming to RPI, but I’ve heard there aren’t a lot of parties. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not coming for that, but I want to know if there are any. Any advice?

You seriously have nothing to worry about. I don’t go out much anymore, but my friends are always deciding between a couple parties on Fridays and Saturdays, and sometimes even on Tuesdays. If you want to ensure that you know about the bigger parties held in fraternities, get to know the Greek community. I personally didn’t rush, but simply knowing people in sororities has helped me get into parties, listed or otherwise. There will be some more strict registered parties where you will need to be Greek to get in, but that really doesn’t happen often.

If you decide the party scene on campus doesn’t suit you, find a group of friends that would rather hang out in a dorm room or somebody’s apartment. This is what I prefer, especially after experiencing parties here, but there is definitely something for everyone.

My boyfriend won’t have sex with me, and I feel like my relationship is lacking physical intimacy. What should I do?

I would strongly suggest that you talk to your boyfriend about this first. Try to figure out why he doesn’t want to have sex. Hopefully, you can come to a compromise that makes both of you happy. If you can’t find something that works for both of you, don’t feel bad about ending a relationship over it. This question reminded me of something Dan Savage stressed during a talk he gave here. (If you missed it, you can read about it at https://poly.rpi.edu/s/avage.) He basically said that sex is a huge part of relationships, and if you aren’t compatible with your partner sexually, that is a valid reason to break up.

Ask Brookelyn is a general advice column that we’ll be experimenting with for the next couple of issues. Be sure to ask your questions at https://poly.rpi.edu/ask.