A suicide survivor is someone who has lost someone, often someone very close to them, to suicide. A little over four years ago I became such a survivor. We survivors think it is very important for us to talk freely about our experiences with suicide to make it easier for all people to talk about it, to help eradicate the stigma of suicide, and to bring the topic of suicide “out of the darkness.” If we cannot talk freely about a problem, then we cannot hope to do something about the problem. When our staff at the Counseling Center does a suicide assessment, one of the questions we ask the student is what he thinks the impact would be on others if he were to kill himself. Occasionally, students state the belief that others would only be upset for a while and then they will get over it. They are wrong. The death of a loved one due to suicide leaves an unbelievable pain that never goes away. Survivors wish that they could have done something to prevent the suicide and have the loved one with them again, well and happy. This wish cannot come true. What can come true is the wish that the rate of those who kill themselves, producing innumerable survivors, will significantly decrease. Mental health professionals can do something toward this goal, but so much more can be done by those who know and live with people at risk of suicide. It can be done by learning the facts about suicide, learning how to recognize others who are depressed, how to talk to them, and how to get them to needed help.
Prevent Suicide by Watching for Telltale Signs:
Most of us have had, or will have, fleeting thoughts of death as a means of escaping from an unpleasant situation at some time in our lives. It is when the thoughts are more than just fleeting that there is need for concern.
The National College Health Risk Behavior Study (1995) has found that as many as 11.4 percent of college students have seriously considered attempting suicide. The National College Health Assessment Survey, done in the Spring 2003 semester (33 schools and 19,497 student participants), produced essentially the same results: 10 percent indicated having seriously considered suicide during the preceding year.
Data reported on http://www.Ulifeline.org (an online behavioral support system for college-aged students) indicates that 8.33 percent of college students go so far as to make a suicide plan. That would translate to over 500 of our student population. About 7.5 of every 100,000 succeed in taking their lives.
Ninety percent of adolescent suicide victims have at least one diagnosable or treatable disorder, but only 15 percent were in treatment at the time of death. How many deaths could have been prevented if more were in treatment?
Indicators of Suicidal Thinking:
Approximately four-fifths of those who successfully complete suicide are ­severely depressed. Many bouts of depression are moderately short-lived and if the person can be helped through the episode, that person has a good chance of recovery. We are talking here of severe depression, not the transient feeling of sadness all of us experience from time to time.
Among the symptoms of depression that can (but not necessarily will) lead to suicide are the following (from Understanding Suicide by Life Skills Education, Inc.):
Fatigue—uncharacteristic and unexplainable exhaustion coupled with an inability to concentrate on manageable tasks. Sleeping Disorders—alteration of normal sleeping patterns, e.g. restless sleep, insomnia, constant sleeping. Changes in unusual eating habits—a sudden change in appetite, either increased or decreased. Changes in personal appearance. Difficulty in decision-making over routine matters—e.g. which clothes to wear, what to eat, what movie to see. Slowness of movement—as though great effort were needed to make any move at all. Crying over unimportant matters and not crying over the important. Anger—irritability over minor causes. Use of non-prescribed drugs or the overuse of prescribed drugs. Feeling alone when others are readily available. Loss of interest in those things that formerly gave a feeling of pleasure or were meaningful. Feeling that most things are overwhelmingly difficult. Feeling everyone has something you do not have. Nagging complaints over minor aches and pains. An inability to initiate or maintain close relationships that are both honest and caring. Participating in self-destructive behavior—e.g. life-threatening, risk-taking activities such as heavy drinking, reckless driving, violence directed at self or others. The inability to resolve difficulties in the past or present, e.g. unstable family environments, alcoholism, incest, child abuse, parental hostility or violence, or spouse abuse. The inability to accept or adjust to the loss of a meaningful and significant loved one (through death, divorce, or separation). The inability to accept or adjust to a dramatic change in lifestyle (such as would be caused by unemployment, business failure, environmental catastrophes). An inability to maintain consistent emotional balance, e.g. exaggerated mood swings from depression and lethargy to energy and euphoria. It has also been found that those who habitually abuse drugs and alcohol have a higher risk of suicide in response to stressful life situations than those who are not substance abusers.
In the next installment I will talk about how to get someone to the right type of help once you have recognized the signs the person is at risk of suicide.
Joe Albert, Ph.D.
Director, Counseling Center
& Suicide Survivor
